Fall and Winter are approaching, which means that studios start cranking out their Oscar bait. While a shallow marketing ploy, it also makes it the absolute best time of the year for cinephiles to go to the movies. Here are some of the upcoming films I'm looking forward to.
The Road
Cormac McCarthy's post-apocalyptic best-seller gets adapted by the guy who brought us The Proposition (one of my favorites films of 2006). Sign me up.
Burn After Reading
There is a trend lately whereby critics associate the phrase "a Coen Brothers comedy" with The Ladykillers and Intolerable Cruelty. Clearly these people have forgotten about Raising Arizona, The Hudsucker Proxy, and The Big Lebowski. Do not underestimate the Coens. Not now, not ever.
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Early word is that David Fincher might finally get an Oscar nod. It's about goddamn time, and might help calm down my anger from Zodiac failing to get a single nomination.
Body of Lies
William Monahan, Ridley Scott, Leonardo Dicaprio and Russell Crowe. There are my reasons.
Quantum of Solace
Ever see Casino Royale? If you answered "No," then guess what you'd better do tonight? And I'm a guy who hated 007 movies.
Zack and Miri Make a Porno
This Kevin Smith comedy was rated NC-17, but got downgraded to R on appeal (without having to make cuts). The last time this happened to Smith? Clerks.
Feast 2 & 3
Because no list would be complete if I wasn't looking forward to some D-grade horror. And I am actually looking forward to these.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Midpoint '08
My fellow blogger Cinema Romantico (who is also the person that trained me during my first day working for a movie theater, the job that ultimately transformed my casual enjoyment of movies into a full-fledged obsession) recently posted his brief Midpoint Review, and didn't have a whole lot to say about 2008 so far. There was never a realistic hope that '08 would ever live up to the year that preceded it. 2007 was a monumental year for modern cinema in terms of quality. 2008, so far, has pretty much been a year of lost opportunities. But I still see that as a good thing.
Take a look at the big blockbusters this year. Both Iron Man and The Dark Knight are beginning to push the formulaic superhero genre into deeper territory with fully developed characters that we actually care about, and action sequences that enhance the plot rather than punctuating it. Hancock also tried a unique take on superheros, though with much less success (quality-wise, 'cause it did just fine financially).
Speed Racer was a huge flop, but no one can argue that it didn't push the boundaries of what a movie can do visually. It was a mind-blowingly gorgeous film that was unfortunately operating off of a weak script. The Happening was also the victim of a bad script, but had an original plot and some great moments.
My point is that many movies in 2008 have been trying to do something new. Even when they fail, I'd rather sit though a movie that has at least some ambition rather than watching another by-the-numbers action thriller or romantic comedy. So I think 2008 has been going great. 2007 showed that audiences are not just attracted to big explosions and pretty people kissing (though those staples are not at risk of disappearing anytime soon), and 2008 has shown us that Hollywood isn't afraid of testing out other waters. In my opinion, the film industry is very slowly starting to realize that we, the audience, are not as dumb as they thought.
As for my picks for the year so far? (in no particular order)
Take a look at the big blockbusters this year. Both Iron Man and The Dark Knight are beginning to push the formulaic superhero genre into deeper territory with fully developed characters that we actually care about, and action sequences that enhance the plot rather than punctuating it. Hancock also tried a unique take on superheros, though with much less success (quality-wise, 'cause it did just fine financially).
Speed Racer was a huge flop, but no one can argue that it didn't push the boundaries of what a movie can do visually. It was a mind-blowingly gorgeous film that was unfortunately operating off of a weak script. The Happening was also the victim of a bad script, but had an original plot and some great moments.
My point is that many movies in 2008 have been trying to do something new. Even when they fail, I'd rather sit though a movie that has at least some ambition rather than watching another by-the-numbers action thriller or romantic comedy. So I think 2008 has been going great. 2007 showed that audiences are not just attracted to big explosions and pretty people kissing (though those staples are not at risk of disappearing anytime soon), and 2008 has shown us that Hollywood isn't afraid of testing out other waters. In my opinion, the film industry is very slowly starting to realize that we, the audience, are not as dumb as they thought.
As for my picks for the year so far? (in no particular order)
- The Dark Knight and Iron Man - for the reasons stated above.
- Forgetting Sarah Marshall - a very funny romantic comedy where the characters act like they are real people, even the "evil" ex-girlfriend.
- The Signal - a low-budget horror movie that looks good and has original ideas. Special mention to the pitch-black comedy 2nd act, which made me laugh harder than anything else this year, then seamlessly transitioned right back into horror.
- Rogue and Black Water - both movies about killer crocodiles that let the animals act like animals instead of monsters. The former lets its characters have the ability to make rational decisions, and the latter shifts away from the reptile and focuses instead on the isolation and fear of the people. SIDE NOTE: When will Radha Mitchell finally be noticed and given the A-list fame she so richly deserves? Watch her in Everything Put Together and then try to tell me she doesn't deserve to be a star.
- Taken - Well-made thriller with a great lead performance by Liam Neeson and a handful of fantastic scenes, but somewhat predictable. (Looks like the US release has been pushed back to January 2009, so this might not actually qualify for this list)
Thursday, August 21, 2008
The Walk-Out
I love to criticize movies. It is so much more fun than praising them. Poking holes in paper-thin plots and characterizations provides me with opportunities galore to think of witty one-liners and clever turns-of-phrase to express my displeasure of cinematic failures. It's like letting setting my brain loose in a carnival of wordplay and hyperbole. I love it.
But past a certain line, I cease to be amused. Some movies are just too worthless and inconsequential to spare the precious breath necessary to even describe their plot, let alone waste brainpower in given them original critiques. I reserve my highest level of criticism for these films, a simple phrase that sums up my feelings perfectly: I walked out.
I am a man who has witnessed every last second of Big Daddy. I bore witness to Crossroads. Somehow I have even managed to survive every theatrical release by Michael Bay and Uwe Boll. Two days ago I even watched Metro for some reason. I own Silent Hill. Clearly I do not consider my time to be worth very much. So when I voluntarily choose to walked out on a film, that is saying a lot.
I should take a moment to differentiate between the act of walking out on a film and the act of stopping a film prematurely. In the modern age of DVD rental services and easily-downloaded film content, it has become commonplace to stop watching a movie if it gets to be too boring or is of poor quality. It is also fairly common to skip through lesser parts of the film, so that the experience is more akin to watching a highlight reel of the movie rather than the movie itself. I am absolutely guilty of these behaviors, which is why I am able to watch so many horrible straight-to-DVD atrocities. Walking out on a film is a purely theatrical experience, so the home video market is automatically excluded. After all, those movies came to me.
When I say that I walked out on a movie, I am meaning: that I left my home; drove my car to the theater regardless of weather conditions; possibly spent money on either admission or snacks (and I say "possibly" because I worked in a theater for many years and thus got everything for free, though money would have made no difference); found a seat; endured the presence of others; allowed my senses to be assaulted by giant images and loud noises; decided that I am willing to write off the whole thing (travel, food, etc) as a loss so I can end the experience as quickly as possible; get back in my car; drive back home; and weep. Or to put it another way: I would rather be tired, depressed and missing 90 minutes of my life than watch the last act of Brokedown Palace.
It is my ultimate insult to a movie. And to the best of my recollection, these are the only films I have ever bestowed such hatred upon:
But past a certain line, I cease to be amused. Some movies are just too worthless and inconsequential to spare the precious breath necessary to even describe their plot, let alone waste brainpower in given them original critiques. I reserve my highest level of criticism for these films, a simple phrase that sums up my feelings perfectly: I walked out.
I am a man who has witnessed every last second of Big Daddy. I bore witness to Crossroads. Somehow I have even managed to survive every theatrical release by Michael Bay and Uwe Boll. Two days ago I even watched Metro for some reason. I own Silent Hill. Clearly I do not consider my time to be worth very much. So when I voluntarily choose to walked out on a film, that is saying a lot.
I should take a moment to differentiate between the act of walking out on a film and the act of stopping a film prematurely. In the modern age of DVD rental services and easily-downloaded film content, it has become commonplace to stop watching a movie if it gets to be too boring or is of poor quality. It is also fairly common to skip through lesser parts of the film, so that the experience is more akin to watching a highlight reel of the movie rather than the movie itself. I am absolutely guilty of these behaviors, which is why I am able to watch so many horrible straight-to-DVD atrocities. Walking out on a film is a purely theatrical experience, so the home video market is automatically excluded. After all, those movies came to me.
When I say that I walked out on a movie, I am meaning: that I left my home; drove my car to the theater regardless of weather conditions; possibly spent money on either admission or snacks (and I say "possibly" because I worked in a theater for many years and thus got everything for free, though money would have made no difference); found a seat; endured the presence of others; allowed my senses to be assaulted by giant images and loud noises; decided that I am willing to write off the whole thing (travel, food, etc) as a loss so I can end the experience as quickly as possible; get back in my car; drive back home; and weep. Or to put it another way: I would rather be tired, depressed and missing 90 minutes of my life than watch the last act of Brokedown Palace.
It is my ultimate insult to a movie. And to the best of my recollection, these are the only films I have ever bestowed such hatred upon:
- Brokedown Palace
- Dick
- Shanghai Knights
- Mortal Kombat: Annihilation
- Sorority Boys
- Jawbreaker (which I acknowledge as the worse film I have ever seen, and I only saw 35 minutes of it)
Monday, August 04, 2008
Liam Neeson is Badass
Hancock
Hancock wastes a great premise but does manage to entertain as a mindless popcorn flick. Will Smith does a decent job as a bitter alcoholic superhero and Charlize Theron does a decent job of being pretty, but Jason Bateman is gratingly annoying. The villain was uninspired, the comedic possibilities of a drunk superhero were squandered, and the "twist" surprises no one but the characters. But I was at least mildly entertained for most of it.
Wanted
Angelina Jolie is sexually attractive. Which is good for Wanted, since her role is just to stand there and look hotter than scientists previously thought possible. Her spoken words are few and far between, which is probably for the best given how ridiculous everyone else's lines are. The plot, style and dialog appear to have been generated by a marketing team that took note of how much young people enjoyed Fight Club, The Matrix and The Fast and The Furious. But Wanted lacks the satire of Fight Club and the ambition of The Matrix, which makes it just about on par with The Fast & The Furious. That's not a compliment.
Taken
Liam Neeson plays an absentee father who is slowly trying to integrate himself back into the life of his daughter (Maggie Grace). He missed out on her growing years while he was "working for the government." His former occupation is never fully revealed, though it is strongly implied that he was involved in some form of espionage. Famke Janssen plays Neeson's ex-wife, who uses every opportunity to undercut Neeson's attempt to be a part of their daughter's life. When the daughter is given tickets to travel around Europe, Neeson is resistant to the idea. Janssen guilts him into signing a release (the daughter is only 17, and needs both parents' signatures to leave the country). Sure enough, the daughter almost immediately gets herself kidnapped. While a contrived development, the kidnapping is perhaps the best standalone scene I've watched this year. Neeson is on the phone with his daughter when it occurs, and he immediately switches into Jason Bourne mode and starts giving her instructions on what to do. I mention Bourne because that is basically who Neeson turns into once his daughter is taken. He flies to Paris and begins tracking down the kidnappers, leading him into a world of human trafficking and corrupt law enforcement. The plot elements are nothing new, but when co-scripted by Luc Besson, the formula is at least infused with some serious energy. But it's Neeson who holds the film together as he relentlessly tracks his daughter down. Like last year's sadly unnoticed Seraphim Falls, Neeson has one goal and moves towards it like a juggernaut. He's enthralling in this role.
Hancock wastes a great premise but does manage to entertain as a mindless popcorn flick. Will Smith does a decent job as a bitter alcoholic superhero and Charlize Theron does a decent job of being pretty, but Jason Bateman is gratingly annoying. The villain was uninspired, the comedic possibilities of a drunk superhero were squandered, and the "twist" surprises no one but the characters. But I was at least mildly entertained for most of it.
Wanted
Angelina Jolie is sexually attractive. Which is good for Wanted, since her role is just to stand there and look hotter than scientists previously thought possible. Her spoken words are few and far between, which is probably for the best given how ridiculous everyone else's lines are. The plot, style and dialog appear to have been generated by a marketing team that took note of how much young people enjoyed Fight Club, The Matrix and The Fast and The Furious. But Wanted lacks the satire of Fight Club and the ambition of The Matrix, which makes it just about on par with The Fast & The Furious. That's not a compliment.
Taken
Liam Neeson plays an absentee father who is slowly trying to integrate himself back into the life of his daughter (Maggie Grace). He missed out on her growing years while he was "working for the government." His former occupation is never fully revealed, though it is strongly implied that he was involved in some form of espionage. Famke Janssen plays Neeson's ex-wife, who uses every opportunity to undercut Neeson's attempt to be a part of their daughter's life. When the daughter is given tickets to travel around Europe, Neeson is resistant to the idea. Janssen guilts him into signing a release (the daughter is only 17, and needs both parents' signatures to leave the country). Sure enough, the daughter almost immediately gets herself kidnapped. While a contrived development, the kidnapping is perhaps the best standalone scene I've watched this year. Neeson is on the phone with his daughter when it occurs, and he immediately switches into Jason Bourne mode and starts giving her instructions on what to do. I mention Bourne because that is basically who Neeson turns into once his daughter is taken. He flies to Paris and begins tracking down the kidnappers, leading him into a world of human trafficking and corrupt law enforcement. The plot elements are nothing new, but when co-scripted by Luc Besson, the formula is at least infused with some serious energy. But it's Neeson who holds the film together as he relentlessly tracks his daughter down. Like last year's sadly unnoticed Seraphim Falls, Neeson has one goal and moves towards it like a juggernaut. He's enthralling in this role.
Friday, August 01, 2008
Briefs
Doomsday
It's Neil Marshall's weakest film, but it was still fun to watch. It pays homage to Escape From New York and The Road Warrior by stealing liberally from them. Hell, I think I even saw stuff from Escape from LA in there. But Rhona Mitra makes an incredibly dull (though spectacularly hot) lead, and great screen presences Bob Hoskins and Malcolm McDowell are given nothing to do. But it was fun seeing about 90% of the Dog Soldiers cast work together again.
WarGames
I remembered this 1983 cult classic as being rather silly and far-fetched. Watching it again, this might be the most accurate representation of a computer hacker I've ever seen. The intelligent computer personality is born from fiction, but everything else about the way computers are treated in this film is accurate. Matthew Broderick spends an entire week just trying to crack a single password. Now that's the boring reality of hacking that's been missing from cinema. As a side note, the film opens with a scene featuring John Spencer and Michael Madsen, in 1983. I never knew either could look so young.
Manticore
For a Sci-Fi Channel movie, it wasn't as ridiculously bad as I was expecting. It wasn't good, but it looked competently made and was reasonably acted. Also, I think they messed up on the Manticore legend, because I'm pretty sure that a flying lion is a Griffin.
Redbelt
I really enjoyed this right up until the "What the Hell?" ending. It felt like the movie was missing its final reel. And because of the terrible ending, it sullies what was turning out to be a great vehicle for Chiwetel Ejiofor.
The Love Guru
What can I possibly add to the giant heap of crap that has been piled upon this film by critics worldwide? I'll say this instead: The Love Guru could have been a great comedy. It has a lot of really funny jokes and sight gags. But Mike Meyers is not content to use any of those jokes just once, and chooses instead to repeat them again and again until just the memory of them makes viewers vomit. An example of this tendency is demonstrated in the first scene of the movie. We hear Morgan Freeman's voice narrating that, as a boy, he found a voiceover machine. The camera pans down to Meyers, who is holding a microphone. That's fucking hilarious. Then, Meyers turns the machine off, and there is a closeup of the machine. We see a knob, and the three options are "On," Off," and "Morgan Freeman." We didn't really need that shot. We all know who Morgan Freeman is, and it doesn't really matter whose voice it was anyway. The joke worked without knowing. But then Meyers says "I had it set to Morgan Freeman." Yes, we already fucking know that! We recognized his voice right away, and then you showed it to us on the knob! We know it's him! You've ruined the whole thing now!
Speed Racer
This will go down as my Guilty Pleasure movie of '08. I loved this movie. I know, it's really really bad. The story is right out of a badly translated cartoon, the brother and the monkey are like having brain herpes, and the visuals threaten at all times to send the viewer into a seizure. But I had so much fun watching all the bright, candy-colored excess. The Wachowksi Brothers are phenomenal filmmakers (though hideous screenwriters), and they pull out all the stops. The intercutting between a past and present race during the opening scene is handled wonderfully, climaxing in cars from both eras racing against each other. And John Goodman surprisingly gives one of his best performances in years. I was enthralled by this, against my better judgment.
It's Neil Marshall's weakest film, but it was still fun to watch. It pays homage to Escape From New York and The Road Warrior by stealing liberally from them. Hell, I think I even saw stuff from Escape from LA in there. But Rhona Mitra makes an incredibly dull (though spectacularly hot) lead, and great screen presences Bob Hoskins and Malcolm McDowell are given nothing to do. But it was fun seeing about 90% of the Dog Soldiers cast work together again.
WarGames
I remembered this 1983 cult classic as being rather silly and far-fetched. Watching it again, this might be the most accurate representation of a computer hacker I've ever seen. The intelligent computer personality is born from fiction, but everything else about the way computers are treated in this film is accurate. Matthew Broderick spends an entire week just trying to crack a single password. Now that's the boring reality of hacking that's been missing from cinema. As a side note, the film opens with a scene featuring John Spencer and Michael Madsen, in 1983. I never knew either could look so young.
Manticore
For a Sci-Fi Channel movie, it wasn't as ridiculously bad as I was expecting. It wasn't good, but it looked competently made and was reasonably acted. Also, I think they messed up on the Manticore legend, because I'm pretty sure that a flying lion is a Griffin.
Redbelt
I really enjoyed this right up until the "What the Hell?" ending. It felt like the movie was missing its final reel. And because of the terrible ending, it sullies what was turning out to be a great vehicle for Chiwetel Ejiofor.
The Love Guru
What can I possibly add to the giant heap of crap that has been piled upon this film by critics worldwide? I'll say this instead: The Love Guru could have been a great comedy. It has a lot of really funny jokes and sight gags. But Mike Meyers is not content to use any of those jokes just once, and chooses instead to repeat them again and again until just the memory of them makes viewers vomit. An example of this tendency is demonstrated in the first scene of the movie. We hear Morgan Freeman's voice narrating that, as a boy, he found a voiceover machine. The camera pans down to Meyers, who is holding a microphone. That's fucking hilarious. Then, Meyers turns the machine off, and there is a closeup of the machine. We see a knob, and the three options are "On," Off," and "Morgan Freeman." We didn't really need that shot. We all know who Morgan Freeman is, and it doesn't really matter whose voice it was anyway. The joke worked without knowing. But then Meyers says "I had it set to Morgan Freeman." Yes, we already fucking know that! We recognized his voice right away, and then you showed it to us on the knob! We know it's him! You've ruined the whole thing now!
Speed Racer
This will go down as my Guilty Pleasure movie of '08. I loved this movie. I know, it's really really bad. The story is right out of a badly translated cartoon, the brother and the monkey are like having brain herpes, and the visuals threaten at all times to send the viewer into a seizure. But I had so much fun watching all the bright, candy-colored excess. The Wachowksi Brothers are phenomenal filmmakers (though hideous screenwriters), and they pull out all the stops. The intercutting between a past and present race during the opening scene is handled wonderfully, climaxing in cars from both eras racing against each other. And John Goodman surprisingly gives one of his best performances in years. I was enthralled by this, against my better judgment.
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