The Films of 2012: Part 2

Brief reviews of the films released in 2012, in no particular order.
Movies are rated as Terrible, Mediocre, Average, Good or Great.

Prometheus
This movie fluctuates wildly between being a fascinating movie where a group of scientists discover and explore the remnants of a long-abandoned alien planet looking for clues about the meaning of existence and an infuriating movie where theoretically-smart characters repeatedly do stupid things stupidly. The first half of the film is wall-to-wall greatness. Then the idiocy starts seeping into the characters' actions, and just keeps on building. The only consistently good element is Michael Fassbender's android character, who is either longing to be more human or just barely masking his utter contempt for humanity. Fassbender is great in the role, and keeps his character's motivations ambiguous (in a good way) for the entire film. Idris Elba is also solid as a blue-collar spaceship captain with all of the film's best lines. The talented Noomi Rapace does what she can as the film's lead, but the thankless way her role is written doesn't do her any favors. Charlize Theron is also in this, though her character has no impact on the plot whatsoever and only exists so Theron's name can show up on the movie's poster. The film is directed by Ridley Scott, so naturally it looks amazing (especially in 3D, as the man knows exactly how to utilize textures and depth of field). It's an ambitious science fiction film that trips over the stupidity of its characters halfway through, and never stops stumbling after that. Still, I prefer ambitious failures to movies that don't try at all.
Special Rating: Frustrating

21 Jump Street
I was pleasantly surprised by this movie. The writers acknowledge up front that the franchise reboot is unnecessary and just exists to make the studio extra money. Then they immediately start trying to upend as many of the original TV show's tropes as they can. Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum (who quietly had a revelatory acting year in 2012) have great comic chemistry together as partners who go undercover as high school students to investigate the appearance of a new street drug. There are some great running gags that illuminate the oft-discussed flaws of the original show (like Tatum instantly being called out for looking way too old, the lack of explosions during car crashes, and the one-dimensionality of Ice Cube's police boss character). It's certainly not a deep movie, but it is a consistently funny film.
Rating: Good

Butter
As an Iowan, I'm naturally sensitive to movies that take place in my homeland (since there are so few). For example, the moment that Jennifer Garner's character spoke in an "Iowan" accent, I wanted to shit in a box and mail it to both the director and the otherwise-seemingly-pleasant Mrs. Affleck. Dear Hollywood, IOWANS DO NOT HAVE AN ACCENT! Well, actually we do have an accent. It's called General American, and it's the most sought-after accent of broadcast television and film because of its lack of dialect. Go here and look at the map on the right detailing the regional home of the General American accent. Notice what state is right in the fucking middle!

Sorry about that, I tend to take these things personally. It would have been easier for me to overlook if the film had been any good, which it is not. Sure, Olivia Wilde is hilarious in a supporting role and Rob Corddry is kinda subdued and sweet as the dad to an adopted young girl hoping to win the butter sculpting competition at the Iowa State Fair, but those are small islands in a sea of mediocrity. A talented cast is mostly wasted. Garner is bad, Hugh Jackman is an embarrassment, Ty Burrell just plays a less funny version of his Modern Family character, and both Alicia Silverstone and Kristen Schaal are given nothing to do. The movie wastes every bit of potential it has, with the exception being Wilde's gleefully inappropriate scene-stealing supporting performance. That lady has an untapped comedic reservoir, Hollywood. Get on it.

Rating: Mediocre

Battleship
Uh...I saw Battleship, right? I mean, I'm pretty sure I did. I have vague memories of Liam Neeson portraying Liam Neeson In An Admiral's Uniform, a giant alien spaceship that apparently escaped from the Transformers franchise, and Rhianna "acting." Also I think there was a slow-motion walking shot of U.S. Navy veterans set to AC/DC. Yes, ok, now I'm sure I saw it. It's the one where John Carter is the bratty younger brother of the True Blood guy who is inexplicably dating a supermodel whom he wooed with a gas station burrito, right? Yeah, ok, I definitely saw it. It sucked.
Rating: Mediocre (and not Terrible only because Peter Berg remains a talented action director, even when he's directing shit)

Wrath of the Titans
I don't even know what to say here. Clash of the Titans was only slightly passable because the entire supporting cast just seemed to be enjoying the bad movie they were in, and that sense of fun translated into the film itself. The sequel doesn't have that, and so there is literally nothing of value left on the screen. A complete waste of time.
Rating Terrible

Chronicle
I saw a couple "found footage"-style movies this year that actually managed to do something interesting with the far-too-overused format. The first was Chronicle, a movie about three teenagers who find an object from space that gives them superpowers. That summary in no way does justice to the film, which is focused on the three characters learning to develop and control their powers. At first they are just having fun, but when one of the teens begins to uncork years of suppressed fear and anger, things turn serious. The first-person handheld-camera style of filming breaks from cliche when one character starts using his powers to levitate the camera, allowing for smooth steadicam-like shots without breaking the "found footage" style. Similarly, the exciting climax is a mix of first-person footage, professionally-shot news footage, and security footage, which livens things up and expands the scale of the movie. The film is an involving little superhero origin story with well-developed characters and enough creative action setpieces to appease the mainstream crowd.
Rating: Good

Magic Mike
Magic Mike is the Steven Soderbergh movie that is supposedly based on star Channing Tatum's real-life stint as a male stripper. And while that brief summary might immediately turn some people on or off, the actual movie is a pretty solid character piece where the stripping is the background, not the foreground. Tatum plays the title character, the star performer at Matthew McConaughey's male strip club with plans of moving on to better things. He takes a young Alex Pettyfer under his wing, introducing him to the exciting nightlife that male stripping brings. He also starts falling for Pettyfer's sister Cody Horn, despite having an ongoing casual relationship with Olivia Munn. The movie is at its best when focused on Tatum, who has the necessary experience to give his character a completely lived-in feel as well as an easy, charismatic chemistry with everyone else on the screen. Pettyfer is the polar opposite, a sub-par actor who feels completely miscast and who has chemistry with no one. The film gets wall-to-wall great performances from its cast, so Pettyfer's weak turn stands out like a sore thumb. Still, Tatum and McConaughey are capable of picking up the slack, so the final result is an entertaining look behind the scenes of a lifestyle many know about but are unfamiliar with.
Rating: Good

Safety Not Guaranteed
This indie drama is entertaining enough, though not necessarily worth the hype it got when it toured the festival circuit. Aubrey Plaza stars as an intern who goes along with journalist Jake Johnson (pretty much just playing a smugger version of his New Girl character) to do a report on a post in the Want ads requesting a companion to go back in time. They track down the poster, a guy played by Mark Duplass with just the right balance of kindness, sadness, paranoia and maybe-craziness to make the character seem sincere about his quest but without coming off as a dangerous lunatic. Plaza is chosen to pose as a responder to the ad, and the films hit the predictable beats of Plaza's character coming to care for Duplass, the inevitable reveals of Plaza's true identity and the hidden emotional agenda of Duplass, Plaza's plea for forgiveness and blah blah blah. There's also a side story of Johnson trying to reconnect with an old flame that is mostly a distraction. Plaza and Duplass make an endearing team and are a joy to watch, but the film is fairly formulaic and offers few surprises. Still, it's a pleasant watch.
Rating: Good

Salmon Fishing In The Yemen
Ewan McGregor plays a fisheries expert tasked by the British Press Secretary (a scene-stealing Kristin Scott Thomas) to help a wealthy sheikh introduce salmon fishing to Yemen, despite Yemen being, y'know, in the desert. McGregor obviously thinks the project is absurd, but is persuaded to help by the sincerity of both the sheikh and the sheikh's assistant, played by the always-charming Emily Blunt. McGregor and Blunt have easy chemistry, and Amr Waked gives the sheikh the right balance of benevolence and drive to really sell the idea that so many people would be willing to help him achieve what appears to be an impossible goal. The movie feels like something out of Old Hollywood, and I mean that in the best way possible. A cast of entirely likable people coming together in an exotic locale to achieve a seemingly impossible feat. That the film still manages a few plot surprises (though not the inevitable romantic pairing of McGregor and Blunt, whose chemistry together all but demands it from the very first frame they share) is but another testament to its quality.
Rating: Great

Side By Side
Side By Side appeals to a very specific niche of moviegoers: those obsessed with the technical aspects of filmmaking. I am part of that niche. Side By Side is amazing to me. Keanu Reeves (wow, didn't see that coming) interviews a staggering assortment of directors and cinematographers about the differences between physical and digital film, from both a filmmaking and an archival perspective. The discussions are in-depth and well-informed. Since the movie is spearheaded by industry veteran Reeves, the collection of interviewees  is a who's-who of industry titans featuring Martin Scorsese, James Cameron, David Lynch, Steven Soderbergh, Danny Boyle, Robert Rodriguez, George Lucas, Lars von Trier and many, many others. Perhaps more impressive is that it even manages to get on-camera perspectives from notoriously interview-averse directors like Christopher Nolan and David Fincher. Again, many people will view this movie as a boring technical slog. But to a certain kind of movie geek, it's almost Biblical. I am happily that kind of geek.
Rating: Great (for some)

The Films of 2012: Part 1

Brief reviews of the films released in 2012, in no particular order.
Movies are rated as Terrible, Mediocre, Average, Good or Great.

The Dark Knight Rises
The epic conclusion to Christopher Nolan's superb Batman trilogy is hugely ambitious in its scope, but would have been better served by carving out unnecessary plotlines and characters (seriously, why are Juno Temple and Matthew Modine in this movie?) Even somewhat-major characters played by Marion Cotillard and Joesph Gordon-Levitt could have been excised fairly easily with one more pass over the script. Tom Hardy and Anne Hathway are welcome additions as Bane and Catwoman, though. As it is, the film drags along during its exposition-filled first act, gains a bit of steam in act two, then falls predictably in line for the finale. It's still a worthwhile film, but it is the least essential entry in the trilogy.
Rating: Average

The Avengers
Joss Whedon was the correct choice to write/direct the apex of Marvel's cinematic universe. The film moves along at a good pace, each major character gets a showcase scene, and the actors' chemistry is natural (especially Robert Downey Jr. and Mark Ruffalo, who had the benefit of having previously worked closely together on the under-appreciated masterpiece Zodiac). There may be some plot shortcuts that feel a little too "movie-y" (SPOILER WARNING: seriously, the mothership gets destroyed and suddenly an entire army, who are shown to be biological creatures, just fall down dead!?), but overall this is a shining example of a superhero mega-blockbuster done right.
Rating: Good

The Amazing Spider-Man
Full disclosure: I do not like Spider-Man. I never cared for the comics, and I particularly hated Sam Raimi's recent movie trilogy (I still struggle to understand how the thoroughly-stupid Spider-Man 2 winds up near the top of so many critics' lists of the greatest comic book movies). So I obviously didn't have high hopes going into this movie. But I liked director Marc Webb's previous film, and I thought the casting was spot-on. The resulting movie is, in my opinion, better than any of Raimi's films, but still falling short of being actually good. Andrew Garfield makes a decent Peter Parker, Emma Stone is only tolerable as Gwen Stacy, and Rhys Ifans is OK-I-guess as Dr. Connors. The only outright good quality of the film comes from Denis Leary as Captain Stacy, who grounds his character with a lived-in sense of realism. The plots is a by-the-numbers affair, and the film offered no real surprises.
Rating: Mediocre

Snow White and the Huntsman
This is the prettier of the two major Snow White films released this year, but the movie's good qualities pretty much end there. Chris Hemsworth proves that he really is leading man material, but the other actors are all over the map. Charlize Theron hams her way through the role of the evil queen, and Kristen Stewart continues her quest to live her entire life using only one facial expression. The murderer's row supporting cast of British character actors (including Bob Hoskins, Ian McShane, Nick Frost, Ray Winstone, Toby Jones and others) are largely wasted (though they seem to be having fun during the five minutes of screen time that they get). The story is overly convoluted, the tone way too dark and serious for the kind of movie it is, plot holes abound, and the gorgeous costumes, set design and cinematography aren't quite enough to make it all worthwhile.
Rating: Mediocre

Mirror Mirror
The other big Snow White film takes the opposite tone, going for light-hearted and fun instead of dark and serious, but otherwise suffers from nearly identical problems. Armie Hammer is a perfectly good leading man, but Lily Collins is flat and boring as Snow White and Julia Roberts goes too far over the top in her performance as the evil queen. Some of the comedy works pretty well (seriously Hollywood, get Armie Hammer in more comedies right this second!), so overall it is the slightly-more-enjoyable of 2012's Snow White films. But only slightly.
Rating: Mediocre

The Cabin in the Woods
As a lifelong horror fan, there are no adequate words for me to express just how great this movie is. Writers Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard (who also directed) set up the perfect cliche horror senario (it's right there in the title), and then find ways to subvert every audience expectation, beginning with the opening scene and lasting right up to the ending shot. It's an invigorating jolt of fresh energy into the genre, one that made my inner fanboy squee with delight. I will mention nothing of the plot, for it is best to go in without knowing what's to come.
Rating: Great

The Hunger Games
The Hunger Games was seemingly being positioned to take the reigns from the departing Twilight franchise, giving 14-year-old girls something new to obsess about for the next four or five years. And with that perception, I was largely expecting the franchise's much-darker-and-more-violent-than-Twilight source material to be watered down for the PG-13 crowd, thus guaranteeing a healthy box office return from the target demographic. These expectations were solidified when the directing duties fell to Pleasantville and Dave director Gary Ross, who had seemingly never directed anything more violent than a paper cut. About halfway into the film, when a teenage boy was slashing the throat of another teenage boy, I realized the franchise had no intention of shying away from the books' content. In fact, I'm actually kind of excited about the franchise now. The world of the film is well drawn, with it's focus on a post-war division of socioeconomic classes. Jennifer Lawrence (who is already the prime candidate for best actress of her generation) is a more-than-capable lead, the supporting cast is uniformly solid (especially Woody Harrelson's haunted former game winner and a deliriously loopy turn from Elizabeth Banks). Ross' direction is maybe a bit too vanilla and workmanlike, though certainly not incompetent (I'm looking at you, every-director-in-the-Twilight-franchise-who-isn't-David-Slade). This was probably the most pleasantly surprising cinematic experience I had this year.
Rating: Good

Skyfall
Until the recent Daniel Craig-starring films, I had never liked James Bond. I always found the franchise too cartoonish. There was never any suspense. Of course Bond was going to come out on top every time, and his efforts to do so would all be undercut and swept away by a clever, smug one-liner before the credits rolled while Bond presumably went off to sleep with some gorgeous woman with a pun-filled name. What I love about the current iteration of the franchise is that, yes, Bond will always come out on top, but he will suffer greatly on the way there and the memory of that suffering will follow him long past the credits. Craig's Bond can be hurt in ways more palpable than ever before, and that makes a larger-than-life character start to seem like a regular (though highly-skilled) mortal man. Skyfall, a superb entry in the franchise, finds Bond hitting a new low. After being accidentally shot while on the job, Bond finds himself slightly out-of-practice and being looked at like an old-world relic of no more use to the modern age. The sense of oncoming irrelevance follows Bond for the whole film, which features the usual assortment of plot twists and action sequences brought about by a villain (Javier Bardem in a very amusing performance) who knows all too well what Bond is feeling. The plot's most welcome aspect is to finally bring the great Judi Dench front and center, at last having M graduate from a supporting player to the film's second lead. Craig may be the star, but this film belongs to Dench. Skyfall also has the distinction of being the only film on the franchise to be directed by an Oscar winner, American Beauty's Sam Mendes. Mendes keeps all the wheels smoothly turning, and lets legendary cinematographer Roger Deakins make every shot look incredible (Deakins' work on Skyfall is nominated for Best Cinematography at this year's Oscars). Overall it is a solid addition to Craig's tenure as Bond, and my second favorite of all the Bond films (Casino Royale being number one, and Roger Moore's films being nowhere on the list at all).
Rating: Good

Wreck-It Ralph
Whoever would have guessed that the non-Pixar animated film from Disney would end up being more creative and entertaining than the Pixar one (at least in a year where Pixar wasn't putting out another crappy entry into the Cars franchise)? Not that Brave was bad (as I'll be pointing out soon), but Wreck-It Ralph absolutely revels in the world in which it gets to play around. The design and color schemes of its various video game worlds are spot-on, the voice actors are good (especially Sarah Silverman), and the plot is simple enough for children to easily follow while providing a bounty of in-jokes and references for teens and adults. It's entertaining from start to finish. It's what Pixar does best, it's just not from Pixar this time.
Rating: Good

Brave
Pixar is the king of CGI family films. Of the eleven Oscars given out for Best Animated Feature, Pixar has qualified for nine of them (Pixar didn't release any films in 2002 or 2005), been nominated for eight of them (only the abysmal Cars 2 failed to get a nomination in a qualifying year), and taken home six of them (Monsters, Inc and Cars were beaten in their respective years). They have perhaps the most solid critical track record of any modern production studio (Cars 2 excepted, though it still made mountains of money). So Brave was pre-saddled with an important legacy to live up to, which makes it hard to judge the film on its own merits. Brave is a decently entertaining film with the typically-lush animation that Pixar is always pushing forward (seriously, watch the detail of the characters' hair). And it gets extra kudos for being Pixar's first film to be co-helmed by a woman (Brenda Chapman, who also co-scripted) and be anchored by a female character. But it is also bogged down by what the esteemed Roger Ebert terms the "idiot plot." That is, a plot where everything could be resolved in two seconds if only the characters would actually say out loud what they are thinking. The characters are agonizingly self-centered, and all the resulting drama feels hollow and unnecessary. It's a rare misfire from Pixar (though, to be clear, nowhere even close to the shitpile that is Cars 2). Though despite its shortcomings, it is still nominated for this year's animation Oscar. Personally, I hope it loses to fellow nominee Wreck-It Ralph.
Rating: Average